The Perfect Trap – Sunday Photo Fiction

Written for Sunday Photo Fiction. A story, about a slight miscalculation in the proper bait to use, begins after the photo.

Genre: Science Fiction/Humor

Photo by: Alastair Forbes

The Perfect Trap

Splork looked down through the port hole in the bottom of the spaceship, hovering in complete silence just above the street between pecan trees. Their ship was fully stealthed, making it invisible to radar and human eyes alike. Though their position was quite undetectable, Splork felt antsy. “Are you sure this is going to work?”

“Of course it is,” said Spinth, leaning his head back in his upper pair of hands. “The people of Earth love Futbol. The sport is played across the planet.”

“So this will work as bait?” said Splork, looking dubiously at the soccer ball.

“Absolutely. Most likely, a human child will see it and pick it up. He’ll be directly beneath our transporter, and then we’ll beam him up. The perfect trap!”

“So, what does Dr. Skorth want with a human child anyway?”

“Testing.”

Splork gnashed his mandibles with anxiety. “No! He won’t spray perfume in their eyes will he?”

“I doubt it.”

“Use them for radiation leak testing?”

“No, silly! Where do you get these ideas?”

“You hear about animal testing all the time, and I hate that. I’m a full member of PETA, you know.”

Spinth rolled in the tub so his other fins could get some water. “If you must know, he wants to know if humans can be trained to operate starships. It’s intelligence testing.”

Splork sighed with relief, then returned to analyzing the data screen. “I still don’t understand why we went back in time to 1962.”

“I don’t know. Something about burgeoning human interest in space travel.”

Splork watched a pickup truck run over the soccer ball. His analyses of human sports was producing anomalies. He pointed to the bait. “So that’s a football, right?”

Spinth sighed. “I’ve done my research, Splork. It’s a futbol.”

“You sure that’s not a soccer ball?”

“Of course not! Nobody plays soccer in Amarillo, Texas, especially not in 1962! You gotta use an American futbol.”

“But the spelling is…”

“Just relax, Splork! It’ll work.”

Splork sighed and watched another pickup run over the ball. He settled in for a long wait.
____________________________________
Each week, Alastair Forbes sacrifices one of his own photos for the greater good, and writers from around the world are impelled to write flash fiction based upon it. Good here and have a look at what other writers have imagined from the photo: http://sundayphotofictioner.wordpress.com/2014/07/20/sunday-photo-fiction-july-20th-2014/

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About EagleAye

I like looking at the serious subjects in the news and seeking the lighter side of the issue. I love satire and spoofs. I see the ridiculous side of things all the time, and my goal is to share that light-hearted view.
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15 Responses to The Perfect Trap – Sunday Photo Fiction

  1. List of X says:

    I knew soccer was an unsafe sport. 🙂

    Like

  2. Lyn says:

    Oh dear, Splork is definitely in for a very, very long wait. I want to see this as a movie. LOL you had a drink of crazy juice before you wrote this, didn’t you Eric? 😀

    Like

    • EagleAye says:

      Well, yes, but don’t tell my wife. She hates it when I don’t share. 😉 That wait is going to be VERY long by my estimation. I hope they have long lifetimes. Thanks so much, Lyn!

      Like

  3. wandapsycho says:

    Fun with aliens! I love this dilemma they’re having. I wonder if they ever caught anybody?

    Like

    • EagleAye says:

      Hehe. No, they didn’t. Their mission couldn’t wait about 40 years. Too bad, the mission commander wouldn’t listen to Splork. Glad you had fun. Thanks for stopping by!

      Like

  4. Daniel_C! says:

    Ha!ha! now this is what I call a bait 😀 This is crazy and I am still on my laughing spree! Well, do you believe in the existence of Aliens? Something like parallel world?? I am curious now..

    Like

    • EagleAye says:

      Cool. I love it when readers have a long-lasting laugh. About aliens: I think the least likely possibility, given the trillions of possible planets in our galaxy, is there are no other life forms out there. So yes, I believe aliens are out there. Then, that begs the question: have they visited Earth? That’s up to debate. I doubt we’re interesting enough just yet, so I’d say it’s unlikely.

      Like

  5. Splork. Great name for an alien! It did occur to me that there might be some hilarious consequences were aliens to turn up with names that, unfortunately, happened to be insults or obscenities in various human languages. ‘Mr President.’ ‘Yes, Secretary of State?’ ‘Can I introduce you to “Kai tutae me e mate!” from the planet Zog.’ ‘Pleased to meet you…and why is that New Zealander laughing at the back?’

    Google Translate allegedly does Te Reo Maori, but it can’t (or won’t) handle that one, incidentally… 🙂

    Like

    • EagleAye says:

      Hehe. We already see fun names just going across cultures. A tame example being “Hello there young lady. I’m Sum Yung Gai.” With aliens, I’d imagine it would get worse, or then again, perhaps completely incomprehensible. Or maybe a faulty translating machine might trigger a diplomatic incident. It’s all interesting to explore. Thanks for the visit, Matthew!

      Like

  6. Al says:

    This made me laugh. Futbol 😀

    Like

  7. nightlake says:

    He calls it futbol and argues it is right. lol

    Like

    • EagleAye says:

      Yup! See? Even aliens can be short-sighted. If they can’t understand that I fear they’ll never understand the many quirky nuances of humanity. 🙂 Thanks for stopping in!

      Like

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