Universal Password – Sunday Photo Fiction

Photo by: Alastair Forbes

Universal Password

Day 632 stuck as a werewolf.

Here’s my story in a nutshell. February 2, 2023: Magic returns to the world. Spells that were only quaint and amusing before suddenly worked. I found a spell that would “temporarily” turn me into a werewolf. Unfortunately, like anything else you find on the internet, it’s not always tested out by professionals. If something is free, buyer beware. I’m now permanently hairy and constantly hungry. I still haven’t found a reversal spell to make me human again. Oh, there’s one posted at http://wizurdhome.ru. Thing is, when somebody can’t spell “wizard” right, I’m not ready to swallow a live electric eel when someone says so.

I like university campuses, mostly because they have a lot of pizza joints. I earn pizzas protecting the weak. I just hang out nearby until some football player frat boy decides to pick on a geek half his size. It happens nearly every night. I stand 8’4″ tall and weigh about 474 pounds (give or take a deep dish pizza). Being bulletproof on top of it makes me nearly invulnerable. So when trouble happens I usually just roar in a guy’s face and he runs for the hills. This particular night, Buck MacGurskey (All-State Defensive End, 372 pounds) threw a 135 pound rocket scientist through a window. I showed up, did my routine, and waited. It seemed MacGurskey drank a case of Bud Light too many and wanted to fight. He took me by surprise, to be honest. I mean, I just reacted, you know?

Anyway, I’m sure the medical technology of 2027 can put the pieces of his jaw back in place.

Am I on a tangent? Sorry. Old man Antonio sent me home with his thanks and a couple large pepperonis. I arrived at Harlow’s Creek where there’s a little bridge crossing over it. That’s when this huge greenish form bent some of the bridge’s steel supports while climbing onto the walkway. It was a troll. Any of you living under rock the past four years might think trolls are a myth. When magic returned to the world, so did the monsters. This troll was pretty typical, standing 12 feet tall with arms the size of tree trunks. “It’s an unlucky day for YOU, traveler,” it grated. “Time to pay the toll, or say the password.”

I knew I could take him, but I just had a fight. I decided to pay the toll.

In this modern society, even before magic returned, nobody says anything completely anymore. People say “L-O-L” instead of “Laughing Out Loud.” Likewise, on college campuses nobody says, “Pizza.” They just say, “‘Za.” It’s understood. I pulled out a couple slices of ‘za. In any university pizza is the universal currency. It’s ALWAYS accepted. It’s better than Visa. I offered it the pizza slices and said, “‘Za?”

The troll wailed and screamed and pulled at its sparse hair. It slumped onto the bridge. “300 years. 300!” it shrieked. “Nobody guessed the password! How did you know?”

What a dummy! Passwords should be longer than that. When I changed my Yahoo password, it had to be at least 8 characters. Sheesh! I felt sorry for it, so I gave it the slices anyway and crossed the Troll Bridge.Ā  Thinking back, it all kinda makes sense. If ‘Za is the universal currency, then ‘Za should be the universal password!
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Every week, Alastair Forbes tosses an original photo into the witches brew of imagination. From there, we are lucky to write flash fiction based upon the photo: Look here for more stories based upon the photo above: http://sundayphotofictioner.wordpress.com/2014/11/30/sunday-photo-fiction-november-30th-2014/

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About EagleAye

I like looking at the serious subjects in the news and seeking the lighter side of the issue. I love satire and spoofs. I see the ridiculous side of things all the time, and my goal is to share that light-hearted view.
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18 Responses to Universal Password – Sunday Photo Fiction

  1. Yinglan says:

    Ha ha, I don’t think I could’ve survive in that universe.

    Like

  2. hemphaus says:

    Cool post!

    HempHausMag.com

    Like

  3. babso2you says:

    I really enjoyed this! Good piece of writing! ^..^

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Must remember to improve my passwords… šŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      These days it’s important stuff these days. ‘Za just doesn’t cut it anymore…unless you’re eating one during the football match. šŸ˜‰ Thanks for stopping in!

      Like

  5. Lyn says:

    As always, you expand the bounds of imagination. I could have done with him thirty years ago to protect me from a certain bully in my life :/
    Oh, by the way, what sort of Za was it?

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      Hehe. Pepperoni, Sausage, Mushroom, Black Olives, and extra Garlic. *Mouthwatering.* I could’ve used such a troll too, and I would’ve known the password to get him on my side. I could’ve kept him pretty busy. Thanks for stopping by! šŸ™‚

      Like

  6. Rosalind Nazilli says:

    Your sense of fun always shines through in your work and I just love your narration of this story.

    Like

  7. Al says:

    Hey … why did you use my password? You could have used something else. I recently changed my password to:

    MickeyMinnieGoofyDonaldCinderellaBaltoSimbaVaderEleven. It said it had to be eight characters with a number.

    I was going to say the other one, but this is a family show hehe

    Great story Eric. I loved it

    Liked by 1 person

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