The Special Ceviche
On March 9th, 2015, three objects were reportedly seen in the skies over the Borracho Todos los Tiempos Vineyards. Many UFO hunters and conspiracy theorists raced to the area, desperate to see what they knew were aliens. Such wild-eyed fanatics always thought that.
Except, this time, they were right.
1,800 alien troops exited three 500-meter ships and spread out across the vineyard. The Mexican Air Force and Army arrived just as the aliens killed off the last UFO hunter. Three hours later, Mexico’s military died to the last man. America promised to send in troops, but it would take a week before they arrived.
Meanwhile, the alien army moved on. Their General, Talupsit Peen, knew their alien biology could easily consume Earth food, so they began to seek it out like locusts. An army moves on its stomach after all. That left Mexico with one thing remaining to stop the aliens for a week until the Americans arrived.
Her name was Genesis Romina Travieso.
Despite possessing unearthly beauty, Genesis never married. She loved only one thing, cooking. Only two things in the world were as hot as her food: Her temper, and nuclear reactors. She did not suffer fools gladly. Genesis owned the most famous restaurant in all Mexico, the Cocina Caliente de Los Traviesos. It was a jealously guarded State Secret. It was the Mona Lisa, the Crown Jewel, the Holy Grail of Mexican cooking. In the small town of Xuajita Bonita, nearly everyone worked for Genesis. Her restaurant could seat 800…and there was a waiting list. In most countries such an important site would be guarded by an army.
Genesis didn’t need one. She had ways making her anger…felt.
After a hot day of working in the kitchens, Genesis sat in a lawn chair outside her restaurant and watched the alien army approaching. Cooking with such spicy food for so many hours, she needed something to cool down with, so she gobbled handfuls of Habenero peppers. Then she did the only thing one could when faced with an army that defeated the most modern weapons of her country.
Standing beside Genesis where she could always be found, Danita rubbed her ear. She replaced a burnt out earplug and gently reminded, “I am here beside you, Senora.”
“Prepare salads for our guests.”
“With the spicy Salsa Verde?”
Danita replaced another ear plug.
Genesis scowled. “We’ll not waste the good peppers on alien swine!”
“Of course, Senora.”
Genesis bid the aliens welcome and invited them into her restaurant. Taken aback by her graciousness and her beauty, the aliens did not destroy everything in sight. Instead, they sat down with smiles and allowed her people to serve them. The aliens were whiter than even white men, Genesis noted. They looked generally human although sadly lacking in facial hair. The salads they ate with fervor contained shredded lettuce, tomato, taco meat, and mild banana peppers. As she walked amongst them she noted that many were panting. Others wiped away a sudden flush of sweat. Voices around her murmured, “Holy Haphunda, that’s hot!”
Genesis sampled a plate. It was so bland it reminded her of water. She shrugged. At least her precious peppers weren’t wasted.
When the aliens finished eating, Genesis presented the bill to the alien general.
“What’s this?” said Talupsit.
“The bill for the food.” Genesis smiled pleasantly.
Talupsit snorted and laughed. “We are an invading army! We do not pay for food!”
Genesis’ smile went up in smoke. “You pay for my food.”
“Go away, woman!”
Genesis’ right eye began twitching, flitting to the side while the other remained stationary. She gathered herself and smiled. “Of course, General. Forgive my insolence. Allow me to serve your troops my finest dish in compensation.”
When the general agreed, Genesis screamed, “Danita!”
Danita sighed, and replaced an ear plug. “Senora?”
“Prepare the Special Ceviche for our guests.”
Danita turned white. “But Senora, our Hazmat suits are damaged from the last time…”
“At once, Danita!”
The American Army arrived as coyotes dragged the last of the toxic spice-soaked alien corpses away. Later, coyotes went extinct in the area. The United Nations thanked Mexico for destroying the alien invaders and saving Earth. It also condemned Mexico for employing weapons of mass destruction. Nonetheless, all was well with the world.
Each Monday, it’s time to finish the story. This week, our photo prompt from Barbara Beacham is the splash image of this post. The opening sentence is, “On March 9th, 2015, three objects were reportedly seen in the skies over the Borracho Todos los Tiempos Vineyards.” Look here for more stories finishing the story: https://mondaysfinishthestory.wordpress.com/2015/03/09/mondays-finish-the-story-march-9th-2015/