Mollie Gob & The Crisp
Glenn, Bert, and Jensen stood on the bank of the lake fishing and drinking beer. Mostly, they drank beer.
Glenn opened a Victoria Bitter. “The story goes,” he said. “There’s a dinosaur, a Plesiosaur they say, is what’s livin’ in the lake.”
“Heard that one too,” said Bert. “That’s fair dinkum.”
“Bloody furphy,” scowled Jensen, munching on potato crisps. “A stupid fairytale.”
“Nah. It’s dinky di,” said Glenn. “Locals call her, ‘Mollie Gob.’ She’s got this long neck. She snatches fishermen straight off the bank without leaving the water.”
The only response from Jensen was him eating crisps.
Bert glared at Jensen. “You keep eating those fookin’ crisps, you’ll become one some day.”
Jensen chewed louder.
“You’re scarin’ the fish, mate! Shoot through, would ya’?”
Grumbling, Jensen wandered down the bank into the brush.
After an hour, Glenn said, “Seen Jensen?”
“Nah, but I can hear him crunching his crisps.”
“Sounds different. There’s meaty sounds too.”
Bert said, “We’d best check on him, I reckon.”
All they found were Jensen’s shredded, bloody trousers. “Strike a light!” shouted Glenn. “Ol’ Molly Gob got ‘im!”
Bert shook his head. “I told him he’d become a Crisp one day!”
When I originally imagined this story, I wanted to look up one, just one Australian/New Zealander slang term. I found so many, I couldn’t help including a bunch of them. Here’s a little glossary:
Furphy: A lie or rumour.
Dinky Di: The real deal. Legitimate.
Fair dinkum: Legitimate. True. Can be used as a question or a statement. Ex: Are you being fair dinkum, mate?
Shoot through: Leave.
Spit the dummy: To become very angry. To have a tantrum.
Crisp: Potato Chip (may or may not be Australian. Definitely British.)
Strike a light!: An exclamation of surprise or frustration.
This is the first writing challenge by author Matthew Wright (as far as I know). So I definitely wanted to join in this one. Check out the original post and see what other folks wrote: https://mjwrightnz.wordpress.com/2015/05/20/writing-inspirations-surprising-beauty-in-artificial-nature/