Horse Trader

Art by: David William Laughlin

Stanford McClusky tipped back his Stetson hat and placed his arms akimbo. He addressed the horses hitched in a line before him. “Now boys. I know y’all are tired. But it’s time to get the cattle to market. I want ya’ll to do yer best. I promise you when this is done you’ll get an extra ration of oats and a first-class rubdown!”

The ranch owner, Gifford Cummins, rode up just then and bellowed, “Mr. McClusky! What in hell are you doin’?”

Stanford winced. “Just givin’ the troops a pep talk, sir.”

Horses don’t need pep talks, Mr. McClusky! Horses cannot understand complex things like language or trading in the stock market for instance. Sooner you understand that, son, the better off you’ll be.” Cummins rode off in a huff.

Stanford sighed and stared down at the ground.

A horse named Caliber nuzzled him and said, “Don’t you worry none, Boss. He’s just mad. He traded for Weber Energy stock that’s down 15% when ever’body knows he shoulda’ bought Consolidated Edison with 4.4% dividend yield!”
Written for the Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers weekly writing challenge. Look here to find the stories other folks wrote in answer to this week’s challenge:

About EagleAye

I like looking at the serious subjects in the news and seeking the lighter side of the issue. I love satire and spoofs. I see the ridiculous side of things all the time, and my goal is to share that light-hearted view.
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14 Responses to Horse Trader

  1. Joy Pixley says:

    As soon as the huffy boss-man said that horses can’t talk, I suspected what was going to happen next, but when I got there, it still made me laugh out loud.

    Or considering the patois of this story, mebbe I should say guffaw. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hahaha! The horses are smarter than the damn boss! LOL! I would say these are horses of a different color. Haha! Love it Eric! Thank you for participating in FFfAW challenge!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Lyn says:

    LOL you’ve outdone your own kookiness with this one, Eric. Absolutely hilarious 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  4. luckyjc007 says:

    Ha! Ha! Ha! Good for Caliber! He knows how to spread the joy to Stantford. He proved that horse sense is better than “no cents” . He will surely get an extra ration of oats and a first-class rubdown!” Love this story. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. jannatwrites says:

    I want that horse…. I could use some financial advice from someone I can trust 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. A horse is a horse, of course, of course… ha ha ha!! Love the story!! 😀

    Liked by 1 person

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