Forget The Leaders

Photo by: Marie Gail Stratford

The alien machine towered over all six lanes of 3rd Avenue. It moved victoriously, as if the city had already succumbed. Traffic came to a standstill. Pedestrians ran screaming for cover.

An alien emerged from the top. Sixteen eye stalks swirled. An armored tentacle pointed imperiously, “YOU!”

Marion Watters sighed. Standing in her threadbare Georgetown sweats, popcorn and mini-quiches in hand, Marion never expected to represent all of Humanity. She sighed.

Now I’ll never finish binge-watching Game of Thrones.

The alien boomed, “Take me to your…”

I DON’T KNOW my leaders!

“…Nearest Starbucks. My wife desires a Chai Latte.”
_________________________________
Author’s notes:

In my mind’s eye, this is Marion Watters (Tembi Locke)

Written for the Friday Fictioneers. Look here for this week’s prompt and links to the week’s many other stories: https://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/2016/03/30/1-april-2016/

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About EagleAye

I like looking at the serious subjects in the news and seeking the lighter side of the issue. I love satire and spoofs. I see the ridiculous side of things all the time, and my goal is to share that light-hearted view.
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46 Responses to Forget The Leaders

  1. joetwo says:

    Chai latte? Very nice!

    Liked by 1 person

  2. mandibelle16 says:

    Lol. Starbucks, “coming to a galaxy near you.” Good news for Starbucks, their business could go way up. I like your lady who supposedly represents humanity, most definitely an anti-hero, but a good choice if your alien wife only wants a chia latte!

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      Haha! Starbucks has populated everything else. Why not space? I had hoped that Marion would be a charming, “everywoman” sort of character. I wanted folks to resonate with her. Thank very much, Mandibelle! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  3. storydivamg says:

    Naturally visiting aliens need the opportunity to sample the popular flavors of the hosting planet. I hope our protagonist complies.

    Cheers!
    MG

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      Of course. Why else would you travel? 😉 Turns out, Marion is quite the expert on Starbucks. She loves Mocha Fraps. She sent the aliens straight to the right place. All is well in the city. 😉 Thanks so much! 🙂

      Like

  4. Mike says:

    Trust Starbucks supplied an extra large bucket and sixteen straws. Lol

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Hahahaha! Even the aliens have heard about our Starbucks. They must have great advertising! LOL!!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. The Voice says:

    Finally! An alien with proper priorities. 🙂

    Liked by 2 people

  7. List of X says:

    Yes, if the alien wanted to meet our leaders, he should have asked for directions to the nearest Hooters.

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Jan Brown says:

    Poor Marion. Just her luck to have the first alien contact in her crappiest sweats. But the alien can tell that she’s someone who knows where the nearest Starbucks is!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Archon's Den says:

    You need directions to find a Starbucks?? 😕 They’re as ubiquitous as Uber cars. If he fell over, he’d probably hit at least two of them, although, in the business district, they tend to be underground..
    Cute tale. Always with the diagonal relationship. 😆

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      I wondered if someone would mention that. In some cities it’s easier to find Starbucks than pay phones. I used to sit in one Starbucks and watch people coming and going from the one across the street. Sheesh! Obviously, this city wasn’t the Northwest. If it was, the aliens had driven by five of them in three blocks! 😉 Thanks so much! 🙂

      Like

  10. Lyn says:

    An alien who considers the needs of his wife can’t be all bad 😀 …and yes, Tembi Locke would make a perfect Marion.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Dear Eric,

    OMG. This made me laugh out loud. Who needs leaders when you can have Latte? I could springboard from there about leaders…but, I’ll refrain…this time. 😉

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      Haha! Stay tuned for more of my stories with my thoughts about our “esteemed leaders.” 🙄 At least while drinking a latte, the aliens had a chance meet someone intelligent… their Starbucks barista. 😉 Thanks much, Rochelle! 🙂

      Like

  12. IfeomaO says:

    Lot of Sci-fi this week. I enjoyed your take on it :)–I could have sworn I saw some starbucks aficionado’s with steady hands and eyes glue to a handheld device lol oh well.

    Liked by 1 person

  13. oldentimes says:

    Excellent, but I ‘d rather have Dunkin’s

    Liked by 1 person

  14. liz young says:

    With all their technology you’d think the alien would have Googled it.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. What a relief! Aliens who only want caffeinated drinks shouldn’t be too threatening!

    Liked by 1 person

  16. Well that should get her home in time for the next episode at least.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. gahlearner says:

    Snort! The folks from Alpha Centauri said, the Sol System Starbucks suck, but our Alien here disagrees. The Starbucks Galaxy Tour hasn’t been that much fun since Beta Arcturis.

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      Haha! Yeah, there are wild stories about Beta Arcturis. That’ll never be duplicated. 😉 The aliens only complain about the Sol Starbucks because the foam isn’t as uniform as it gets in zero-gee. Starbucks is working on that. 😉 Thanks so much! 🙂

      Liked by 2 people

  18. madamewriter says:

    Ha! Great surprise! Funny that the aliens already are hooked on lattes.

    Liked by 1 person

  19. “Standing in her threadbare Georgetown sweats, popcorn and mini-quiches in hand, Marion never expected to represent all of Humanity.” This. Perfection. I would love to read a longer story, if you ever consider it.

    Liked by 1 person

  20. Priceless, Eric. You made my day. XD — Suzanne

    Liked by 1 person

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