Mayor of Chicago, Rupert Johnson was furious. He shouted at his Chief of Staff, Marion Caldwell. “This is a disaster! ”
“But sir,” said Marion. “You wanted innovative ideas.”
“But not this!” The native Chicagoan loved his city. The horrific spate of gun violence troubled him deeply.
Johnson’s secretary ushered in Stanford Hawkins.
“Hawkins!” roared Johnson. “What the hell did you do?”
“I thought you’d be pleased, Mayor,” explained the spindly scientist. “I think my Probability Engine worked perfectly.”
“Well yes, it worked but…”
“You wanted a solution that reminded the people of Chicago of their commonality.”
“I did and…”
“So I thought changing all the city’s bullets into Bratwurst matched your request perfectly.”
“But, my god man, Bratwurst? Of all the things you could’ve done.”
“I could’ve done cheese puffs.”
“That’s not the point! It’s bratwurst, Hawkins,” raged Johnson. “Bratwurst without sauerkraut and mustard? Are you insane?”
Written for What Pegman Saw: https://whatpegmansaw.com/2017/04/29/chicago/
My Probability Engine is based on the notion that in any given moment anything is possible. You shouldn’t expect your computer will turn into a daisy, but there is a “probability” that it could happen. For more on this, consider the Infinite Improbability Drive from “Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy”: http://hitchhikers.wikia.com/wiki/Infinite_Improbability_Drive
Bratwurst (properly served with sauerkraut and mustard):