
Photo by: Björn Rudberg
While colonists settled in at Humphrey colony, construction continued apace.
Jeffrey and his friends explored this alien world. Climbing Menlo’s mountain, they walked past a construction sign warning people away. Soon they encountered Mahouts guiding a massive Gahinder.
The massive, six-legged beast trundled along, its maw gouging through rock and dirt to make the mountain road. The kids walked up to the beast’s massive behind.
Henry, the lead Mahout, shouted at them. “Get back! It’s not safe there.”
“But Gahinders are tame,” said Jeffrey.
Henry pointed at the Gahinder’s huge anus. “That dirt won’t stay in his belly forever!”
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Written for the Friday Fictioneers: https://rochellewisoff.com/2018/03/21/23-march-2018/
Author’s Notes:
Though this story features a road construction crew, they were controlling a large animal to do it. I wasn’t sure what to call the workers. I figured the Thai Elephant handlers made the most sense as a template. That’s how I got “Mahout.”
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mahout
Argh! The mental image… 😀
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Same here. I may have trouble sleeping tonight. 😉
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A good story about a crappy subject! Gotta love it!
Scott
mine: https://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2018/03/21/heres-your-sign/
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Hehe. I woke up feeling like crap today. 😉 Glad you enjoyed this. Thanks Scott! 🙂
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They tell me to write from the fart…I mean heart.
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Haha! I certainly wrote from it today. Thanks Scott!
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Excellent!
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Entertaining, the title made me laugh 🙂
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Well I’m happy you laughed. That’s the whole goal. Thanks Iain!
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Ew.
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Owie too. Those pooper pellets weigh in at 18 pounds apiece!
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LOL! You definitely would NOT want to be on the wrong end of a Gahinder when it lets loose!
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No kidding! When they fight each other over mating rights, that’s their weapon of choice. Just wait until you see the dung beetles on the planet. 😉
Thanks Joy!
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Hmm, given how useful the Gahinders are, this makes me wonder what kind of work can we put those dung beetles to!
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Hehe. Just roll up the colony’s trash into big balls and let the beetles go to work! Could be handy.
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Still, it would be worse… the Gahinders might be able to fly 😮
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Yipes! It could still be worse. The Gahinders might turn out to be sentient and not amused at being service animals. The revolt of the Gahinders might be…wait for it…revolting. 😉
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I love your choice of ‘mahout’. It feels exactly right. The detail of your alien world is good, too.
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Thanks so much, Penny. I appreciate that. 🙂
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I actually read a story about a guy dying in elephant poop. Evidently, the elephant had been suffering from constipation for quite sometime. His handler had fed him different laxatives with no results, so he chose to try a giant suppository. As he was trying to insert it, the laxatives kicked in and the unfortunate handler became buried in feces. Not the way I want to go. 🙂
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Some things just can’t be unread.
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Were you like me, and started holding your breath before you realized it?
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Yipes! So if he gets reincarnated, doomed to do things over again, does that mean he’ll return as a corporate office worker? Dying beneath an immense stack of shite? 😉
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It could happen.
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Oh dear, Eric .
I should never eat breakfast and read your stories at the same time. I came dangerously close to spewing on this one. Guffaw! Gurgle! He he!
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Almost there! There’s nothing like “twice scrambled” eggs all over the newspaper. *Sigh* I’ll have to keep trying. I’ll get you, my pretty! 😉
Thanks Rochelle!
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This could get messy 🙂
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It’s going to take a whole bottle of stain remover, I’d wager. 😉
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Oooh yuc! Delightfully different.
Click to read my 100 Word Story!
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Thank you kindly! 🙂
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I think I may need to go and bleach my imagination now… 😦
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Probably a good idea to boil it too. You can never be too careful if you want it clean again. 😉
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A fun read, I wondered if I had stumbled into a new world, a new planet – somewhere full of interesting creatures – then I discover the same problem; what do you do with the waste?
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I’m guessing use it for fertilizer? Your cucumbers might taste funny and, my, what an interesting shade of puce! But hey, they’ll grow and you won’t starve. Besides, an extra pair of antennae never hurt anyone. 😉
Glad you had fun. Thanks!
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What is it with boys and their fixation with pipi caca?
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I have no idea. Maybe it’s a holdover from our chimp ancestry, when poop could be used as a weapon. 😉
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Buahahahaha!!
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Eeeeuuw.
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I agree. That’s a behind you don’t want to get behind. 😉
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Oh, so that’s how the hand on the sign got black (since we are all being disgusting here anyways) 🙂
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Exactly. And if you see a sign where the face is black too, you know what happened. 😉
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-Gahinder’s huge anus- The name Gahinders is funny enough. I’m still smiling.
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Awesome. I love sharing smiles. Thanks much!
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Can’t unsee the mental image….. Well on the plus side the poo paper industry will be thrilled. http://elephantpoopaper.com/index.html
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Oh wow. With one stinky cannon ball they could print complete dictionaries! Fun link.
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A fun, entertaining and very different story. Really good.
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I do like to push the envelope. 😉 Thank you most kindly!
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I would keep my distance to any beast feeding on rocks…..
Massive mudslide coming
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Haha! There’s a mudslide coming alright, but mud is only part of it. I don’t want to be beneath anything coming out of an animal’s backside. 😉
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Bombs away!! Lol
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Haha! Instead of kaboom it’s “splat!”
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Make like a buffalo turd and let’s hit the trail 🙂
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Haha! 😀
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