Stinky Cannon Balls

Photo by: Björn Rudberg

While colonists settled in at Humphrey colony, construction continued apace.

Jeffrey and his friends explored this alien world. Climbing Menlo’s mountain, they walked past a construction sign warning people away. Soon they encountered Mahouts guiding a massive Gahinder.

The massive, six-legged beast trundled along, its maw gouging through rock and dirt to make the mountain road. The kids walked up to the beast’s massive behind.

Henry, the lead Mahout, shouted at them. “Get back! It’s not safe there.”

“But Gahinders are tame,” said Jeffrey.

Henry pointed at the Gahinder’s huge anus. “That dirt won’t stay in his belly forever!”
___________________________________
Written for the Friday Fictioneers: https://rochellewisoff.com/2018/03/21/23-march-2018/

Author’s Notes:

Though this story features a road construction crew, they were controlling a large animal to do it. I wasn’t sure what to call the workers. I figured the Thai Elephant handlers made the most sense as a template. That’s how I got “Mahout.”
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mahout

About EagleAye

I like looking at the serious subjects in the news and seeking the lighter side of the issue. I love satire and spoofs. I see the ridiculous side of things all the time, and my goal is to share that light-hearted view.
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53 Responses to Stinky Cannon Balls

  1. Varad says:

    Argh! The mental image… 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  2. A good story about a crappy subject! Gotta love it!
    Scott
    mine: https://kindredspirit23.wordpress.com/2018/03/21/heres-your-sign/

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Iain Kelly says:

    Entertaining, the title made me laugh 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Joy Pixley says:

    LOL! You definitely would NOT want to be on the wrong end of a Gahinder when it lets loose!

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Lyn C says:

    Still, it would be worse… the Gahinders might be able to fly 😮

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      Yipes! It could still be worse. The Gahinders might turn out to be sentient and not amused at being service animals. The revolt of the Gahinders might be…wait for it…revolting. 😉

      Like

  6. pennygadd51 says:

    I love your choice of ‘mahout’. It feels exactly right. The detail of your alien world is good, too.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I actually read a story about a guy dying in elephant poop. Evidently, the elephant had been suffering from constipation for quite sometime. His handler had fed him different laxatives with no results, so he chose to try a giant suppository. As he was trying to insert it, the laxatives kicked in and the unfortunate handler became buried in feces. Not the way I want to go. 🙂

    Liked by 3 people

  8. Oh dear, Eric .

    I should never eat breakfast and read your stories at the same time. I came dangerously close to spewing on this one. Guffaw! Gurgle! He he!

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 2 people

    • EagleAye says:

      Almost there! There’s nothing like “twice scrambled” eggs all over the newspaper. *Sigh* I’ll have to keep trying. I’ll get you, my pretty! 😉

      Thanks Rochelle!

      Like

  9. draliman says:

    This could get messy 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Sandra says:

    I think I may need to go and bleach my imagination now… 😦

    Liked by 1 person

  11. James McEwan says:

    A fun read, I wondered if I had stumbled into a new world, a new planet – somewhere full of interesting creatures – then I discover the same problem; what do you do with the waste?

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      I’m guessing use it for fertilizer? Your cucumbers might taste funny and, my, what an interesting shade of puce! But hey, they’ll grow and you won’t starve. Besides, an extra pair of antennae never hurt anyone. 😉

      Glad you had fun. Thanks!

      Liked by 1 person

  12. Dale says:

    What is it with boys and their fixation with pipi caca?

    Liked by 1 person

  13. Oh, so that’s how the hand on the sign got black (since we are all being disgusting here anyways) 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  14. Dan Bohn says:

    -Gahinder’s huge anus- The name Gahinders is funny enough. I’m still smiling.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. subroto says:

    Can’t unsee the mental image….. Well on the plus side the poo paper industry will be thrilled. http://elephantpoopaper.com/index.html

    Liked by 1 person

  16. lisarey1990 says:

    A fun, entertaining and very different story. Really good.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. I would keep my distance to any beast feeding on rocks…..
    Massive mudslide coming

    Liked by 1 person

  18. goroyboy says:

    Bombs away!! Lol

    Liked by 1 person

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