Special Smoked Beef

Photo by: Yinglan Z.

Cuesto’s Restaurant advertised the finest smoked meats anywhere. Gordon and Heath assumed the very best.

Heath told the waiter, “I’ll take the Special Smoked Beef, please.”

“Very good, sir,” said Emil, the waiter. “Please follow me.”

He led them outside to a small smoke shack. Puffs of smoke wafted out the small door. “Please make your selection inside, sir.” He waited for a long moment then said, “May I be of assistance, sir? I have sauces available: Habanero mango, Mint-mojo, Fennel pesto.”

Heath emerged looking indignant. “I’m afraid these meats are unsatisfactory. We’ll be going now.”

As they walked to the car, Gordon said, “What was so wrong?”

Heath growled, “Honestly! It was a bunch of cows sitting on benches and smoking Occidental Reserve Robusto cigars.”

“No way!”

“I kid you not. They did that to living animals.”


“Agreed. They should’ve given them Havana Cigars or nothing!”
Written for: Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers: https://flashfictionforaspiringwriters.wordpress.com/2018/04/09/fffaw-challenge-week-of-april-10-2018/

Author’s notes:

I actually know very little about cigars. I had to look them up here:

About EagleAye

I like looking at the serious subjects in the news and seeking the lighter side of the issue. I love satire and spoofs. I see the ridiculous side of things all the time, and my goal is to share that light-hearted view.
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19 Responses to Special Smoked Beef

  1. James says:

    Smoked meat or smoking meat? 😀

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Bladud Fleas says:

    I like this. good job the joint didn’t have a joint smoking a joint. 😮

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Hahahahahaha! This is hilarious! Cows smoking cigars! Well… he said he wanted smoked beef! LOL! Great story Eagle Aye!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Lyn says:

    Obviously that restaurant is nothing but a cheap joint. What could the proprietors have been thinking? It’s Cuban cigars or nothing 🙄


  5. I am now imagining them finding some of the customers ‘smoking hot!’


  6. yarnspinnerr says:

    LOL. Brilliant take.


  7. List of X says:

    Making cows smoke cigars is animal abuse! It’s addictive and it’s bad for the cows’ health! They should just slaughter the cows and smoke them the old-fashioned way!


  8. I couldn’t figure out where you where going at first, but you had me laughing by the end.
    Great Story,

    Liked by 1 person

  9. athling2001 says:

    Great humor here and in your other stories. Thanks for the smile.

    Liked by 1 person

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