Birthday Greetings

In Portal, North Dakota, the US and Canadian customs agents often hung out together, telling tall tales about their respective countries.

Morris, the American customs agent stood 6’10” and boasted nearly three-hundred pounds of solid muscle. Morris was used to getting his way in life. If he wanted anything he would rumble, “But I want to!” which usually convinced anyone. Lastly, his favorite greeting was to pick up someone and shake them. Morris alone thought this was hysterically funny.

One day, the agents met on the Canadian side to celebrate Etienne’s birthday. Before Morris entered the tavern, the Canadians looked at him very seriously and said, “They say Etienne is half-moose. So, it’s best not to shake him.”

Morris scoffed at the obvious tall tale. “But I want to!”

He entered the tavern and roared, “Where’s Etienne! C’mere little buddy!”

“Hello!” said Etienne. All 8-feet of him eclipsed even Morris. His four-foot antlers cast deep shadows across the big man’s stricken expression.

As Etienne shook him like a ragdoll, Morris squeaked, “Happy Birthday?”
___________________________________
Written for What Pegman Saw: https://whatpegmansaw.com/2017/05/20/portal-nd/