An Interrupted Vacation

Posted on January 13, 2018 by EagleAye

The Team was exhausted. The sPecial Horrifying and UnKnown Manifestations of Energy unit (PHUKME!) had been pursuing incredible beasts across the world. They’d battled giant mantises, giant hairball spitting cats, and nosy neighbor-killing giant spiders. The spider episode had affected them the worst. They needed a break.

They settled into a bungalow in Fiji, expecting to relax.

It didn’t last long.

They heard massive explosions and all ran outside. The nearby city was under attack by gigantic hummingbirds. They sighed collectively and began donning their equipment.

Only Lindsey smiled. “Oh! I love hummingbirds. They’re so pretty, so graceful.”

Brock hefted his weapon: the Extraordinarily Active Tachyonic Manifestation Eliminator (EATME!). “Seriously?” he choked. “Those hummingbirds are firing proton beams out of their beaks and smashing skyscrapers. They’re devastating the city!”

Lindsey shrugged. “I’m cool with that. At least they’re not Giant Spiders.”
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Written for What Pegman Saw: https://whatpegmansaw.com/2018/01/13/what-pegman-saw-fiji/

Author’s Notes:

I’m on a streak of the positively silly. I decided to continue it today. This story refers to a couple of my most recent stories:

Nosy-Neighbor eating Giant Spider

The Nosy Neighbor

Giant Hairball Spitting Cat

The Cat Owner

About EagleAye

I like looking at the serious subjects in the news and seeking the lighter side of the issue. I love satire and spoofs. I see the ridiculous side of things all the time, and my goal is to share that light-hearted view.
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31 Responses to An Interrupted Vacation

  1. pennygadd51 says:
    January 13, 2018 at 12:45 PM

    Ain’t that the way of it, though? Just when you thought you’d killed the alligators and could drain the swamp, you get an influx of spitting cobras… Loved the name of your monster hunting unit!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    • EagleAye says:
      January 13, 2018 at 12:57 PM

      I know. It happens all the time. Just recently we got a guy who swore he would drain the swamp. Instead, we got a House full of snakes. C’est la vie.

      Glad you enjoyed the name. Thanks so much, Penny! 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

      Reply
  2. TechFlax says:
    January 13, 2018 at 12:56 PM

    Beautiful one

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  3. Matthew Wright says:
    January 13, 2018 at 2:23 PM

    That’s a great name for a monster hunting unit! Yeah, giant spiders can really put a downer on someone’s day (‘Thank goodness I brought my can of Raid…DISGUISED AS A ZEPPELIN…’) 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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    • EagleAye says:
      January 13, 2018 at 10:06 PM

      Hahaha! I have a much smaller can of raid, disguised as a tanker truck. 😉 Giant Spiders are just eewy. A kind hearted evil genius would make laser-firing giant butterflies instead.

      Thanks Matthew! 🙂

      Like

      Reply
  4. J Hardy Carroll says:
    January 13, 2018 at 2:31 PM

    It’s like a video game where half the fun is seeing what kind of monster comes next! Good stuff.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  5. James says:
    January 13, 2018 at 3:15 PM

    When doing research for my wee horror story about the real-life cannibals in Fiji’s past, I discovered that a common way for villagers to great the Chief was by saying “Eat me.” No lie.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  6. k rawson says:
    January 13, 2018 at 3:23 PM

    The acronyms are a blast. I have a hairball spitting monster purring behind my shoulder right now as I write this and know well that you do not exaggerate. Entertaining as always!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    • EagleAye says:
      January 13, 2018 at 10:14 PM

      I love doing acronyms. It’s a habit I picked up from scifi author Keith Laumer. Purring is another thing I forgot to mention in my giant cat story. Wouldn’t a giant cat’s purring cause earthquakes? 😉

      Thanks so much! 🙂

      Like

      Reply
  7. Lyn says:
    January 13, 2018 at 7:02 PM

    I love it when you’re on a streak of the positively silly, Eric. At least the Hummingbirds were firing the photon beams out of their beaks. It could have been worse…much worse! 😮

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  8. List of X says:
    January 13, 2018 at 7:45 PM

    Are there even skyscrapers in Fiji? Or did hummingbirds get them all?

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  9. prior.. says:
    January 13, 2018 at 10:13 PM

    very fun – and felt like it would make a nice comic.
    and um, quite appropriate to have
    “nosy neighbor-killing giant spiders”
    because our arachnid friends are great at getting at those pests

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
  10. Kelvin M. Knight's blog says:
    January 14, 2018 at 3:06 AM

    There’s such a swagger in your stories, that shows you are enjoying writing them. you are certainly at ease in your genre, no matter how scary or hairy it gets. Very graphically entertaining Could see this as a comic, or a children’s (sorry) video game. You contacted Nintendo yet??

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply
    • EagleAye says:
      January 14, 2018 at 9:20 AM

      Thanks for the kind words. I do enjoy writing them. I’ve been an avid reader of scifi for four decades. Curiously enough, I rarely ever read comics. I would occasionally peruse someone elses. They’re fun and I love the movies. I’ll have to check in with the makers of the game Duke Nuke ’em and see of they’re interested in this. 😉

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  11. draliman says:
    January 16, 2018 at 2:42 AM

    I’m sure PHUKME’s EATMEs are up to the task 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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  12. Indira says:
    January 19, 2018 at 11:08 PM

    Your stories and comments both are enjoyable. You are best in this genre.

    Liked by 1 person

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