The Descendant

Photo by: Fatima Fakier Deria

Hugh Paxton sat at the table beneath the pine. He checked his pocket watch, expecting that fabulous inventor, Brighton Waldrop, to return to 1803 any moment.

Light flashed and the ornate time machine appeared. Waldrop joined Paxton with a relieved sigh.

“How was the future, old boy?”

“Wondrous and terrifying all at once!”

“Eh?”

Waldrop produced a cell phone. “This is the future’s phone.”

“Good God! Marvelous!”

“Almost.” Waldrop brought up his Facebook account. “You know Mrs. Zuckerberg, perchance?”

“Gads! World’s worst rumor monger. Shares everyone’s secrets with everyone.”

“Well her descendant, Mark, now shares secrets on an industrial scale!”
________________________________
Written for The Friday Fictioneers: https://rochellewisoff.com/2018/03/28/30-march-2018/

Author’s Notes:

Before anyone calls me on it: taking a cell phone back the 1800s means it wouldn’t be connected, true. However it still could bring up your Facebook and display the cached posts in offline mode.

If you’ve been living in the woods and off the grid, then you wouldn’t know about the Facebook data scandal.
https://www.gq.com/story/zuckerberg-sorry-your-data-stolen

In defense of Facebook, they are trying to do something about the breach.
https://www.wired.com/story/new-facebook-privacy-settings/

About EagleAye

I like looking at the serious subjects in the news and seeking the lighter side of the issue. I love satire and spoofs. I see the ridiculous side of things all the time, and my goal is to share that light-hearted view.
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48 Responses to The Descendant

  1. James says:

    Uh oh. I fear for Mrs. Zuckerberg’s life should these two gentlemen decided to change future history.

    Liked by 2 people

  2. k rawson says:

    I can’t even begin to tell you how much this story delighted me. He’s not just sharing secrets, he’s selling them to the highest bidder!

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      So glad to hear you enjoyed it. And yeah, he sold that info to soulless organization and trusted them to manage it responsibly. Pish-posh! I hope Zuckerberg hasn’t purchased any bridges lately. 😉

      Liked by 2 people

  3. Iain Kelly says:

    Ha, very good topical post. I am amazed that everyone is so surprised by this news, I thought it was fairly obvious that your Facebook data was collected. I’m also curious what data everyone is putting on the internet that they are now upset they told the world about.

    Liked by 2 people

  4. Dale says:

    Oh Lawsy! This is funny-not funny… 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Up there on Zuckerberg’s farm!

    Liked by 1 person

  6. List of X says:

    I don’t think that Mark himself shares all that much. He’s mainly counting on our sharing to make him billions.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I live in the woods, have never been on Facebook — and you’re making me so glad now. However, would you mind going back and deleting every comment I’ve ever left on your blog. I’m sure I’ve said something politically incorrect at some point, and don’t want the world to know that I don’t think like everybody else. 😉

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Alice Audrey says:

    LOL! Too true! I read a biography about him in which they mention he got himself in trouble in college by posting pictures of co-eds, comparing them to each other and various animals. It went viral.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Lyn says:

    On FB the idea is to keep your family and friends close and their friends far away.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Sandra says:

    Like others, I’m amazed people are so suprised by these latest revelations. This was a timely and light-handed reponse – good one.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. Dear Eric,

    I have a love/hate relationship with Facebook. I’ve made good friends on it. But it’s become, at times, such a hostile place. Love this take and laughed out loud at Mrs. Zuckerberg. (I know better than to be drinking at the same time 😉 )

    Shalom,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 2 people

    • EagleAye says:

      My Dad once said, “I HATE Facebook.” Not his thing, apparently. Most of the time I’ve visited it sparingly, and my profile is largely empty. I’ve also seen the bizarre hostility you mention. I just don’t understand that. Oh well, I’m glad Mrs Zuckerberg was still good for a laugh. Thanks Rochelle!

      Like

  12. pennygadd51 says:

    Another Friday Fictioneers post from EagleAye, another chortle! I really enjoyed this story. It’s an entertaining foray into historical SF
    Actually I love Facebook. It’s how I know what my children and grandchildren are doing – and all with colour pictures too!

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      Nice! I love sharing chortle here and there. And actually Hannah’s grandparents are keeping up with her via Facebook too. There’s more pics of her than of me in my account. 😉 Thanks Penny!

      Liked by 1 person

  13. What would we do without all those recipes and silly videos? Great post, Eric. I chortled too.

    Liked by 1 person

  14. granonine says:

    What a great story! Made me laugh.

    Liked by 1 person

  15. granonine says:

    And, BTW, there are some things I hate about FB, but others that I really love. I hate it when people write mushy love letters to other people. Keep it private, folks. I hate it when a completely innocent comment stirs up a firestorm of anger and spite. Clue: If you ever do click on a news-type line, don’t read the comments. Your literacy rate will drop like a rock. Your cursing vocab will increase. Stupidity is rampant, and if no one else will listen to Stupid, then Stupid will post it on Facebook.

    However, I love keeping up with kids and grandkids; love the pics they post; and I love some of the really funny videos I get to see. I also use FB to publicize both my blogs. I do NOT publish anything criminal or embarrassing, although if the Politically Correct crowd has any say, I will probably end up in a cell next to Christine.

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      Haha! I am totally behind you. There is some really strange stuff going in FB. It’s weird to see people you know having a a very public argument on Facebook. It’s like they’re airing their dirty laundry in front of everybody.

      But then on the other hand, my wife and I belong to a group about birdwatching and some of them are terrific photographers. I belong to a group about writing and it’s helpful and inspiring. I’m posting pics of my daughter and the family really loves it. In such cases FB really shines and does, what I believe, it’s really for.

      Liked by 1 person

  16. lisarey1990 says:

    Great story. Loved the bit about the phone.

    Liked by 1 person

  17. draliman says:

    Haha, fun and topical, nice one!

    Liked by 1 person

  18. As I was telling a friend the other day, I wish I was important enough for me to have any secrets that Facebook could steal and sell to the highest bidder 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  19. A timely take indeed! Love it or hate it, it’s now part of most peoples lives.

    Click to read my 99 words!

    Liked by 1 person

  20. James McEwan says:

    I loved this contemporary dig at today’s social media society . Well done. However, in a future with no secrets – beware of the shadows beneath your bed. Just saying.

    Liked by 1 person

    • EagleAye says:

      Thank you! I have no idea what the future holds. I’m sure no one expected social media to take hold so completely. I use Facebook myself. I just see it as a tool that, like a dangerous saw, needs to be wielded carefully.

      Liked by 1 person

  21. Dahlia says:

    Hahah – a killer last line.

    Liked by 1 person

  22. athling2001 says:

    Hilarious! Well done.

    Liked by 1 person

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